


You are Just my Type

by CinnamonSecrets



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, F/M, Fluff and Crack, M/M, Mild Language, Minor Violence, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-02-07
Updated: 2015-08-22
Packaged: 2018-03-10 22:09:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,279
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3305192
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CinnamonSecrets/pseuds/CinnamonSecrets
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stiles is determined to woo Cora with Derek’s help, even when he keeps messing with his head because he thinks he isn’t serious about it. </p>
<p>And why everyone else thinks Stiles has the hots for Derek?</p>
<p>Also: Lots of puns!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Following the steps

**Author's Note:**

> This is a Stora fic I'm writing for my lil sis, so I hope you all enjoy. It's not beta'ed, so I apologize for the awful mistakes you'll find around. This is an Alternate Universe where everybody lived, the Nogitsune never existed but Scott is still the True Alpha.

 

Stiles was a rational human being. As rational as someone with ADD could be, of course. And he had a werewolf best friend, he enjoyed solving murderers far too much and he didn’t have a mouth filter. Other than that, he was pretty normal. Realizing that Lydia was no longer his goddess, and he felt just a very deep friendship bond for her was a surprise; not that Lydia changed, she was still perfect, smart and beautiful … but he just didn’t feel *that way*. If discovering that he was over Lydia was a surprising, realizing his new and improved crush sure was a shock.

They were at the pack meeting, with Scott once again trying to be an Alpha, but the reunion actually being directed by Derek who had more experience and was bossy by nature. Stiles was bored with hearing Derek giving speeches, but the dude really was in the zone tonight, even pointing out how everyone in the room let superficial things come between the pack bond. Probably referring to the Isaac-Allison-Scott love triangle extravaganza. He glanced at his right, noticing Cora completely bored as well … and nobody could say that Stiles Stilinski passed an opportunity to chat a pretty lady up.

“What’s up mini-Hale?” He whispered, knowing well that Derek would hear him anyway, but as long as he didn’t interrupt his speech he couldn’t care less.

“Stilinski, didn’t you know it’s rude to talk when someone else is giving a speech?” Cora smirked. He loved that smirk.

Wait, what?

“I knew you were bored too!” Stiles decided to ignore the thought of thinking that Cora Hale was adorable. Just until he could freak out alone. “What’s the deal with your brother and speeches?”

“He was fond of them even before the fire,” Cora explained and her expression closed off. Stiles knew this was a sore subject for all the Hales.

“And where’s Peter? I thought he was trying to prove he was a somewhat decent human being lately.” Stiles decided to change the subject.

“First my brother, now my uncle? If I didn’t know better, I would think you are very interested in the male members of my family.”

“What?” Stiles sputtered, raising his voice and earning a glare from Derek. “That’s so creepy! I mean, what? Me, interested in a sociopath … or Peter?” He pretended to be hurt. “Please!”

“Good one.” Cora smiled, and that made Stiles’ heartbeat race through the roof, being noticed by every werewolf in the damn room.

“Stiles?” Scott asked, concerned.

“I’m fine!”

“Are you sure?” Cora put her hand on his arm, and damn … RED ALERT, RED ALERT! This was exactly like Lydia, no … even worse than Lydia because now he was tempted to blurt out poems about Cora’s smile. Fuck.

“I’m pretty sure I’m just nervous because everyone keeps staring at me,” he glared at Derek. “Didn’t you have a speech to finish?”

“I’m done.” Derek frowned. “We were talking about training.”

“Oh.”

“Did you even pay attention to what I said?” Derek asked.

“Uhm … we are reckless and thinking with our dick?” Boy, Derek had no idea that in his case, this was in fact, true; but then, if he knew, Stiles would die painfully. He had no idea how Derek would react if he finds out that now he had the hots for Cora, but he could guess it wouldn’t be ‘I approve, let’s start the debauchery’. No, it would be more on the side of ‘I’ll cut off your dick and then kill you slowly’. Yeah, let’s not involve Derek yet in this situation.

“You’re doing it again,” Cora whispered in his ear, and man, that sent a shiver down his spine.

He glanced at her, noticing her beautiful eyes and the delicious lips and … man, he was gone. He was in love with Cora Hale. Boy, he just kept falling for the impossible type.

And that was how he discovered that somehow between saving everyone and sharing life anecdotes, he fell in love with Cora – I-growl-when-you-are-an-idiot-which-is-almost-every-time-we-meet- Hale.

However, unlike his crush with Lydia, he decided to actually plan something more in the short-term than creating another ten-year plan to woo her and then become Cora’s second husband. He certainly didn’t want to wait ten long years, so … this needed a more direct approach.

 

* * *

 

 

“All right, all right, I’m here.”

Scott entered through his window at 2 a.m., at Stiles previous summon. He had to blackmail Scott who kept complaining about the hour, but whatever. This was important.

“Scotty … I need your help.”

That made his friend change into alert mode.

“What? What did you do? Did you play with Deaton’s potions again? Dude! He warned you!”

“NO! Thank you for that, you know it wasn’t my fault. Anyway, no, I mean that I have again trapped in the most unattainable crush ever.”

“More unattainable than Lydia Martin?” Scott frowned.

“Yeah, and I love it when you know SAT words, dude. If I wasn’t so in love with someone who could probably kill me with just a glare, I would totally steal you from your weird threesome way.”

“I’m ignoring that.” Scott sighed. “All right, you decided to acknowledge your crush on Derek Hale. Now what?”

“Now I’ll – wait … what? NO! How can you say that? Derek? Ewwww!”

“It’s not Derek?” Scott looked surprised.

“Do I look suicidal to you? What could I possibly find attractive in Derek Hale?”

“Well … you two are assholes … he is somewhat good-looking if you like the murderous/hot look and since you liked Lydia, that was a given … you keep arguing … I don’t know.”

“That was disturbing, and completely WRONG! First, yes, we are assholes, hence we probably would smother each other, second, he’s hot. Yes, I can appreciate the hotness in other people, but that doesn’t mean I want to bone them, are we clear?”

“Crystal.” Scott nodded. “I feel oddly relieved myself, I mean, having a Hale as an in-law? That would be a disaster.”

Stiles smiled, knowing well what Scott meant. Since they were brothers in all the sense of the word, whoever they picked as a partner would be the in-law of the other one. He was fine with Allison, but now that Scott probably will throw Isaac in the mix he would have to make concessions.

“Well, don’t celebrate too soon. I may not find Derek suitable for the Stilinski love, but I wouldn’t cross off the other Hales out of the list.”

“What? If it’s not Derek, then … man, no! NO, NO, NO! I FORBID IT!”

“Hey! What’s the problem with Cora? She is hot!” Stiles felt affronted on Cora´s behalf. She was a catch, even if she was way out of Stiles’ league.

“Cora?” Scott seemed to calm down after hearing that. “Oh, that’s good. I thought you meant Peter!”

“Okay, ewwwww, even worse than Derek! Why in seven hells would I be interested in that?”

“I don’t know man, you have pretty weird taste ... but, Cora … good, she’s the least violent Hale. What’s the plan?”

“I need your Alpha help dude. Here I present my new plan to woo Cora Hale.”

As Scott looked the small board next to the ‘mystery wall’, Stiles could notice how he kept shaking his head. Whatever, he had to help because if he bailed, Stiles had blackmail material for decades. And Scott knew it; that was why he had the resigned face already.

 

* * *

 

 

**Plan to woo Cora Hale:**

_Step 1: Ask for permission to court her from her ~~father~~ … older brother._

 

* * *

 

 

 

“What are you two morons doing here?” Derek said as soon as he opened the door of the loft.

“And hello to you too,” Stiles said sarcastically. “That’s the way you talk to your Alpha?”

“Yeah!” Scott said, mostly to annoy Derek.

“I repeat: What are you two morons doing here?” Derek kept his Hale trademark glare. On Cora was hot, on Derek was kind of psychotic.

“We have to talk about Cora.” Stiles decided that if they didn’t get to the point, Derek would make them leave.

“What about Cora?” Derek at least stepped aside so they could enter the loft. “She’s not here, do I need to call her?”

“No, no, no,” Stiles shook his head quickly, “we don’t need Cora.”

Derek kept his frown, looking at them like they were crazy.

“Then what is it?”

Stiles looked at Scott, who nodded encouragingly. All right, he could totally do this.  

"Derek, certain events in our lives had made us friends –”

“We are not friends.” Derek glared.

“Acquaintances…”

“No.” Derek still glared at them.

“Brothers in arms then! Whatever, we know each other, is that good enough for you?”

“Go on.”

“Thank you. Well then, as such, with your new family situation, finding your sister and everything … speaking of sisters, I don't know if you have noticed, but Cora is ... what's the word I'm looking for, Scotty?"

"Hot." Scott supplied promptly, making Derek's eyebrows twitch in annoyance.

"Yeah, like a true Hale," Stiles nodded, knowing that saying that to Derek wasn't the best of the ideas he had about how to approach this subject with Big Wolfy Brother.

“You think my baby sister is hot,” Derek said in a warning tone.

“She is! I mean, she’s beautiful, smart, has a mouth on her that man, even leaves me speechless, and the werewolf thing is actually a turn on. Our babies will be strong, smart, beautiful and sarcastic. What else could you ask for your nephews or nieces?”

“Did you just say you like my sister?” Derek translated from Stiles to English.

“Did I?” Stiles feigns ignorance.

“That’s what I heard.” Scott kept nodding. Maybe it wasn’t the best idea bringing him here.

“You like my sister.” Derek sounded like someone just cursed him. “What about Lydia Martin?”

“Dude, that’s so last year!” Stiles waved his hand.

"First, don't call me dude." Derek warned. "And second, you are here, telling me that you like my sister … why exactly?”

“Well, I’m not a Neanderthal, Derek. I actually want to try my best in wooing the hell out of your sister, and the first step is asking for permission to court her like the lady she is.”

“You are asking me for permission to court Cora.”

“Are you going to repeat everything I say?” Stiles finally snapped. “What is wrong with that?”

“I can’t believe that the sheriff’s son wants to ‘woo’ my sister.” Derek snorted. “What is this? Teenage drama?”

“Hey!” Stiles said, offended. “I’m trying my best here! I don’t even know much about werewolf courting, and Scott is useless!”

“Hey!” Complained Scott.

“Ah, so this is why.” Derek growled. “You want me to help you 'woo' Cora; and you think this is the best way to get on my good side?"

"Oh, no! We know you don't have a good side. I was thinking a little bribery could do the trick?" Stiles smiled timidly.

"And you?" Derek glared at Scott.

"I'm here for moral support. Also, Stiles thought having me here would decrease the chances of you maiming him and shoving him against walls."

Without any warning, Derek grabbed Stiles' shirt and pushed him against a wall. Typical.

"It didn't work." Derek announced, smirking like the asshole he was. "And why would I help you with my sister? That would mean having you here all the time. I have enough problems, to add you as my brother-in-law."

"Hey, Cora could do worse!" Stiles defended himself. He was a catch! Even Derek had to admit that his sister had a temper; also the fact that Stiles knew about werewolves and didn't run away scared should give him points.

"That's true, besides it's not like Stiles hasn't kissed her already," Scott said, apparently in an attempt to make Derek murder Stiles and be over with this before his date with Allison.

"What?" Oh, goodie, the full Hale 'rage!glare'. Stiles was going to die.

"It's not like it sounds!" Stiles tried to placate the beast. "She was unconscious at the time!"

"WHAT?"

Before Stiles could get the chance to dig his own grave deeper, they heard the door opening.

"What are you doing?"

Derek, Scott and Stiles exchanged looks, while Cora seemed confused.

"Hi, Cora!" Stiles waved stupidly.

"Stiles." Cora then looked at Derek. "Are you going to kill him? We just cleaned the blood from the witch you decided to piss off."

"I'm considering it," Derek said like if contemplating to kill Stiles was something usual in the Hale household.

"You will have to clean it up. I'm going for a walk."

Cora turned around towards the door, while Stiles thought of something clever to say. She was gone before he decided on a witty response.

"Stop staring at her," Derek warned, "that's my little sister."

"I totally respect that, dude! So ... helping me, then?"

"It could be worse." Scott quipped. "He could be wooing Peter."

"Dude!" Stiles was going to kill Scott.

"I'm just saying, Derek could be dealing with worse things than you trying to get into Cora's pants. Like what about wooing you? I mean, imagine that!”

"That was really poetic, Scott, thank you for your support. I should have just come by myself." Stiles muttered.

"Are you two idiots done?" Derek asked, irritated. "If I'm remotely considering helping you, we have to talk about ground rules. You need to prove you are worth of my sister’s affections. So you will have to do everything EXACTLY LIKE I SAY."

"That's a yes, right? That's Derek-speak for 'I'll totally help you, Stiles, as I can't imagine anyone better suited to woo my sister'."

"I'm regretting this already." Derek rolled his eyes, letting go of Stiles' shirt.

"It's going to be fun!"

"I'm having a blast." Scott smiled widely.

 

* * *

 

 

**Step 2: Show that you can provide for her.**

 

_Derek’s suggestion: Kill a deer._

 

* * *

 

 

“I don’t know man.” Scott frowned. “This whole thing seems stupid. I mean, a deer? Really?”

“Scott, should I remind you about your bunny encounters when you were freshly turned into a wolfy character?” Stiles grabs the Taser with a tight grip, hoping he could actually pull this off.

“Well, there’s your opportunity,” Scott pointed out, looking ahead.

Stiles saw a deer, yes, an actual deer, eating near a tree. This scene looked straight out from a Disney movie. Fuck, this would be harder than what he thought.

“Well?” Scott said.

“I’m trying to think how to approach it without scaring it.”

“It looks like it’s a very calm deer, it doesn’t look like it cares that we are whispering near it.”

“Thank you for making this even more difficult, Scott.” Stiles took a deep breath. “All right…. Here I go.”

Stiles started walking very slowly with the Taser ready to just knock the deer out and then see how he could kill it without feeling remorseful and stupid. He was close, just a few more steps …

“What are you doing?”

“Wahhh!”

Stiles turned around, completely scared, and Tasered whoever dared interrupt his moment of glory.

He had to admit that seeing Chris Argent shaking on the wood’s ground was kind of funny.

 

* * *

 

 

“So … Chris Argent decided not to press charges for assault, even though you practically sent him to the hospital.” His dad shook his head.

“He scared me!” Stiles defended himself. This was totally unfair, he didn’t mean to Taser Mister Argent, also he lost his deer as well. This day sucked.

“This is the part where you explain *why* you Tasered Chris Argent.”

“I was actually trying to Taser a deer.” Stiles explained.

“Yeah, see? This – this actually doesn’t explain anything at all. Why did you want to Taser a deer?”

“I wanted to kill it, but I didn’t want it to do it bloodily and Allison tried to teach me how to shoot arrows and it was a disaster.”

“Son, I know I asked why, but I actually meant that you should start. At the beginning.”

“I’m trying to woo a werewolf.”

“Oh, boy.” His Dad pinched the bridge of his nose. “And you decided to kill a deer because…?”

“Apparently one of the things that makes you a suitable mate is providing your intended, and a deer is the best meat for a werewolf. Something about juicy or meaty or something. Derek explained, but I didn’t hear anything pass ‘you need to bring a deer’.”

“Maybe he said ‘a beer’ and you just misheard.” His dad suggested, sounding serious, but Stiles could see a small smile forming on his lips.

“Har, har. No, he said ‘deer’.”

“Stiles … I know you are fully committed to this courting thing when you get interested in someone. I remember your years of mooning about Lydia. But, if you are so smart, why didn’t you just ordered the damn deer over the Internet? I mean, if you managed to get an exact replica of Johnny Depp’s penis then –”

“WHAT! How did you know that! I was very discreet!”

“I’m not stupid Stiles. And as I was saying, if you got that thing, then you surely could find a deer. I know I said you weren’t gay, but I have accepted that you have this thing for Derek Hale. If he wanted to be courted that badly –”

“Wait, wait! You think I want to court Derek? That’s not it! Why everyone thinks that I’m into Derek? I mean, the guy is hot, I appreciate that. Also, I’m bisexual Dad, surprise, I give equal opportunities, so … yeah … that explains … the little gift thing I gave myself to celebrate the fact that I’m open to all the possibilities. That doesn’t mean I want to bang Derek.”

“First, don’t use ‘bang’ ever again. Second, you keep arguing with the Hale boy, what was I supposed to think?”

“That I was trying to get information about the Hale I’m actually interested?”

“Don’t tell me it’s Peter,” his father said in dismay.

“NO! That’s even worse than Derek. Yet, everyone says that too. I meant Cora. Gee.”

“Cora Hale?” His dad actually smiled. “She is handful. Perfect for you. I approve.”

“Thank you. You should share that with Derek, he thinks I need to prove my worth before giving me the thumbs up at being his brother-in-law.”

“Well son, she’s his baby sister. I won’t try to understand the logistic on the deer thing, but please, be more careful.”

“I’ll try.” That’s a compromise, he could outright say ‘I have no idea what Derek will ask for me, so I can’t assure I won’t be charged with something in the near future.’

“That’s all I ask.”

Stiles was running out of ideas when Allison refused to teach him to shoot arrows ever again after the second try. Isaac ended with an arrow on his ass. It wasn’t Stiles’ fault, Isaac distracted him and well … yeah, he probably should be banned from every lethal weapon in the vicinity. And he couldn’t use the Taser again after Mr. Argent confiscated it and made Allison promise to never let Stiles ‘borrow’ another one ever. He still had a twitch in his eye.

 

* * *

 

 

Stiles took a deep breath. He clutched the amulet he ~~stole~~ borrowed from Deaton to disguise his heartbeat, and hoped it worked. He knocked quickly and then ran for his life, hiding down the hall.

He glanced at the door, seeing Cora opening it. Excellent.

“Derek!” He heard her shouting.

Derek came closer, standing behind Cora.

“What’s that?” Derek asked.

“It’s a giant deer … a plush deer…”

 

 

 

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” Derek said in an exasperated tone.

“Why would Stiles give me this?” Cora frowned and Stiles tried not to swoon. Yes, he admitted it, he could swoon over Cora, she was very swoon-worthy.

“How do you know it’s from Stiles?” Derek tried to sound casual. Man, he sucked at it.

“I can smell him all over this thing. Also who else makes this annoying puns at every chance they have?” Cora sneered. “It’s very big.”

“I can see that.” Derek tried to look into the hallway, probably trying to catch Stiles.

“It’s not my birthday … do you know anything about this?” Cora then glared at Derek

“Hey, the guy is an idiot. That’s not my fault.” Derek defended himself. “He was probably trying to show he can provide for you. I’m guessing … if I had to guess … which I did.”

God, Derek, please shut up.

“Provide for me?” Cora frowned. “With a plush deer? And, why would he want to show he can provide for me? Is he trying to court someone and he’s rehearsing the whole process with me? Is it Lydia?”

Did all the Hales were oblivious about things? Stiles could hit himself on the wall.

“I don’t know. You’ll have to ask him.” Derek rubbed his forehead.

“Oh, I’ll ask him. Trust me, I will ask him for sure,” she said, grabbing the plush deer from the neck and dragging it inside the loft.

Man, Stiles had the feeling he would be that plush toy in the near future.


	2. The Plot Thickens

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What was this? Some teenage drama? It was time for drastic measures.

The next pack meeting, Stiles was acting like he didn’t just leave a plush deer two days ago for Cora to maim (he thought she maimed it… he doubted she ate it… although…).

“And why do I have to be always in charge of surveying the damn woods?” Erica complained.

“As if you and Boyd didn’t make out when you are on ‘surveying duty,’” Lydia scoffed.

“Children, children.” Peter intervened, finally attending one of these meetings. Stiles frowned, looking at him with distrust.

“Scott,” Derek sighed, “please tell them about the security plan.”

“Oh, yes… the security plan.” Scott probably had no idea what Derek meant. “We have to check things out to avoid another catastrophe,” he said proudly, almost like he had answered the question of the century.

When everyone started talking at the same time (except Stiles, who was looking at Cora), Scott finally gave his first alpha order: ‘shut up!’ Derek was probably proud. They decided that this meeting was just getting too off-topic, so they called quits and started packing their things to go home.

“Stilinski,” Cora said, standing in front of him, “I have a bone to pick with you.”

“Oh.” Stiles tried not to be scared (or turned on). “And what would that be, mini-Hale?”

Cora glanced at his right, and Stiles noticed Derek and Peter standing there; Derek with his arms crossed and Peter looking far too cheerful for someone who just spent two hours with teenagers. The rest of the pack was already gone.

“A little privacy?” Cora said, sending shivers down to Stiles’ spine.

“But I want to see this!” Peter smirked.

“And this is my house.” Derek also complained.

At Cora’s not too subtle growl, Peter raised his hands in surrender, walking to the door. Derek just frowned.

“Derek.” Cora glared at his brother.

“Fine. I’m going to pick up dinner. He’s not invited, so he better not be here when I come back.”

“Derek, that’s so nice of you, thank you, I don’t want to stay over,” Stiles said sarcastically.

“Don’t kill him.” Derek warned, before closing the loft’s door.

“I can’t promise anything,” she said, knowing that Derek could still hear her.

Finally, the two of them alone, and Stiles felt like this was a setup.

“Soooo,” he said, because the suspense was killing him. “Fancy seeing you here.”

“Shut up.” Cora slammed him against the counter. Damn, these Hales didn’t know anything about using their words. “What game are you playing, Stiles?”

“I usually play Lacrosse… unless you mean video games, then I have a variety of –”

“Don’t act stupid.” Cora interrupted him, still with her arm on Stiles’ chest. Man, this could be great if only she wasn’t so pissed off.

“I have no idea what you are talking about.”

“The stupid deer?”

“Hey! Bobby isn’t stupid!” Stiles defended. “He is awesome!”

“Bobby? You named it ‘Bobby’?” Cora seemed confused.

“Yeah, but you can change it if you want to. What name would you like to give him?”

“What? Why are you giving me things? Why are you acting weird? And why my brother has a list named ‘things I’m going to make Stiles do’ in his drawer?”

“Uh… I thought the deer was obvious enough… I’m not acting weird, I’m like this all the time…, and your brother is insane.”

“I don’t have time for this. What.do.you.want?” Cora glared, and she looked angry.

Stiles was baffled. Why was she upset? He was trying to woo her. She should be giving him moony eyes, not trying to kill him.

“What do I want? Do all the Hales are this dense?” Stiles said, trying to understand what could have gone wrong with his plan. Unless… “Wait… is it the deer? Did you want another animal? A bear? A tiger? Katy Perry’s left shark from the Super bowl? The puns would be harder to find, but I can totally do it! I can –”

“I don’t care about the stupid animal, Stiles!” Cora interrupted him. Rude. “I want to know *why* you left that thing here!”

“Oh. I thought it was obvious enough?” Cora snarled at him, so probably this wasn't the best moment to be evasive. “Well, Cora, when a guy likes a girl, really, reaaaally likes her, he tries to be nice to her, right?”

Cora just looked at him with a frown, translating the meaning behind his words. And he thought Derek was the hopeless Hale.

“And what? Did you want to try it on me so you can be nice to Lydia and be successful in getting her?”

That wall looked so tempting. Stiles was hitting it with his head; nobody could be this oblivious. Maybe Scott.

“No, dummy, I want to be nice to you because I want to be successful in getting *you*.” Stiles finally snapped. “Wait… not that I meant something sexual, but if that’s on the menu, who am I to say no?”

“Call me ‘dummy’ again, and I’ll rip out your throat with my teeth. Do I look stupid to you?” Cora growled.

“No!”

“Am I supposed to think you are courting me? After all the years you spent pinning over Lydia? What game are you playing here, Stilinski? Do you want to make her jealous?”

“Okay, first of all, I’m offended you think I could pull a stunt like that one! I care about other people’s feelings.” Stiles defended himself.

“Yeah?” Cora lifted the Hale eyebrow of doom.

“Mostly… depending on the situation… that’s not the point. I’m interested in you, and I want to prove it. I asked your brother for permission! If that doesn’t scream ‘interested’ I don’t know what will.”

“You asked Derek?”

“Yeah… it wasn’t pleasant. He’s just a messed up guy…, but I don’t mind having him as my brother in law. His broodiness isn’t hereditary, right?”

Cora actually smiled, which made Stiles feel butterflies in very interesting parts of his body.

“All right, I don’t believe a word of what you are saying, but at least it should be entertaining.”

“I’m 100% serious here, mini-Hale. I’m going to woo the hell out of you, and by the end of Derek’s stupid list, you’ll be mine.”

“We’ll see then… now get the hell out of my house.”

“Lovely chat, mini-Hale!” Stiles blow her a kiss while she just shook her head. At least this gave him a small hope in getting her.

He just needed to play his cards right.

 

* * *

 

**Step 3: Give her something she enjoys.**

 

_Derek’s suggestion: A pole._

 

* * *

 

 

“Derek… this is very strange… I mean, you are telling me to give her a pole, right?”

“Yes.” Derek frowned, like he didn’t understand why Stiles was baffled by the suggestion.

“A.POLE.” Stiles repeated with emphasis.

“Y.E.S” Derek glared.

“Um… all right. You are a very cool brother in law, Derek. I must say you surprise me.” Stiles smiled at him.

“I don’t see why. A pole is something Cora would enjoy.”

“Oh, me too buddy, me too.” Stiles should stop thinking about Cora on a pole, before he had a nosebleed.

“And why would you enjoy seeing Cora's training?” Derek looked confused.

“Training? Is she a pro at this? Dude, awesome!” Stiles cheered. Man, he was so lucky!

“Cora trains with me sometimes. She is good.”

Stiles was now confused. Derek too? Man, this family was really weird.

“Don’t tell me that Peter is also good at this pole thing,” Stiles shuddered.

“He used to train us when we were kids,” Derek explained.

All right, horrifying images of all the Hales on thongs were flashing through his mind.

“Is that why you are rich? Strip money?”

“What?” Derek now looked completely lost. “What are you talking about…?” Derek then seemed to be on the same page as Stiles, and he was not amused. “A pole for training, dumbass! We use poles to train! Is everything related to sex in your mind, idiot?”

“Well… I am 17.” Stiles shrugged. Oh, a pole for their weird training regimen. That made more sense.

But imagining Cora on a pole with a very seductive outfit was a wonderful thing. The other two Hales were just traumatizing.

“Ugh.” Derek pinched his nose. “I can’t believe I’m helping you with Cora.”

“Hey, you weren’t clear enough!” Stiles defended his point. “However… a pole? That’s very impersonal. What else does she like?”

“She eats a lot of bananas,” Derek mused out loud.

Oh God… was Derek doing this on purpose? He was an asshole!

“Next?” He said, with his voice barely a whisper.

“She says she likes flowers.” Yes! Finally a somewhat coherent suggestion.

“Great! What kind of flowers?”

“I don’t know… the pole is a good gift! Without your weird train of thought.” Derek glared at him.

“Derek… just imagine me giving your baby sister a pole…”

Derek frowned, but then glared at Stiles, fisting his hands probably having weird ideas about the situation.

“Flowers are good.” Derek finally said. “Roses... No, wait… maybe daisies… sunflowers… no, no… roses, roses are good.”

“Thanks.”

 

* * *

 

 

“I don’t understand why I am here.” Scott kept complaining.

“I’m new in this flower thing. You are in a weird threesome and probably use a lot of flowers. Hence why you are here,” Stiles nodded, like that made sense.

“You just love to throw the whole threesome thing to my face, right?” Scott grumbled. “Besides, it’s not a threesome… we are… being… friendly.”

“Right. I don’t remember you being *this* friendly to me.”

“So… Flowers?”

“Derek said roses. Obviously, I’m going in a completely opposite direction of what he suggested because he’s an asshole and had no idea what flowers Cora likes.”

“How do you know?” Scott frowned.

“He kept saying flowers like he was trying to guess which one Cora could like. I’m going to let fate decide this, Scotty.”

“Oh, no…”

“Oh, yes…”

After being banished from the Flower shop with horrible threats of jail time, Stiles finally had the perfect flower: Tulips.

 

* * *

 

 

Stiles noticed that his father kept looking at him weirdly during dinner. He faked obliviousness and kept talking about how his room could probably use some remodeling.

“Speaking of that, want to tell me why Mrs. Solis called and said you were banned from her flower shop forever, with extra emphasis in forever, and said I owed her three hundred dollars?”

“I was wondering how long I could stall the topic.” Stiles sighed.

“I admit hearing all about male circumcision for the first part of the meal was fun,” his father said, sarcastically. Nobody could deny those Stilinski genes. “However, I want to know why my son cannot longer enter a flower shop and apparently traumatized a dog.”

“It was a small dog! A Chihuahua! Those are already traumatized!” Stiles defended himself. This was completely unfair! That woman was a witch… hm… he should ask Deaton about it.

“That’s not the point, Stiles. What the hell were you thinking, throwing flowers around and asking strange women to decide which one would look better on the floor?”

“Wow, she really told you all the details, uh?” Stiles shook his head. “I thought she would give you like the abridge version or something.”

“Scott broke a jar of glitter.” His father scowled.

“Yeah, that was pretty funny,” he laughed. Scott’s face was priceless. He was making that picture his Christmas card this year.

“Son, I hope you know this means you’re grounded, and you are going to pay those three hundred dollars.”

“What? This is totally unfair!”

“So it was making Mrs. Solis cry when you crushed her beloved gardenias.”

“That was not my fault! The Chihuahua bit me! Maybe I’ll become a were-Chihuahua and you don’t even care.”

 “Stiles… just pay the damn money and no computer for one week, got it?”

“Yes, sir.”

“If this whole courting thing doesn’t kill you, it’s going to kill me,” his father complained.

For some reason, Stiles thought his father wasn’t exactly exaggerating.

 

* * *

 

 

“Why the hell is dark in here?”

Stiles saw Derek reaching for the light switch, and he slapped his hand away.

“Don’t touch that, grumpy wolf. I’m creating a mood here.”

“A mood for me to kill you? Because I’m feeling inclined to do it. How did you manage to enter my loft anyway?”

“I’m stealthy and crafty,” Stiles said with pride.

Derek frowned.

“Peter let you in?”

Damn. Derek always ruined his fun.

“Not the point. When is Cora coming home?”

Derek then just looked completely blank, and he did this weird thing with his eyes like when he wanted to avoid the subject.

“What?” Stiles turned the lights on; he needed to see the eyebrows of doom. Those never lied.

“Maybe this isn’t the best time for your wooing thing,” Derek said with disdain, but the eyebrows told otherwise. Derek was anxious about something.

“Why?” Stiles glared at Derek.

“Because I said so.” Derek tried to sound annoyed, but again, those eyebrows kept saying ‘danger, Will Robinson’.

“Derek, have we met? Since when I do what you say?”

“You’ll start now.”

Derek grabbed his arm and started pushing him towards the door. All right, he was a werewolf, but Stiles was used to Scott trying to manhandle him. He had a few tricks under his sleeve.

He kicked Derek on the crotch.

And while Derek hunkered down, saying profanities (man, he could teach Stiles a few ones), he ran and put the flower arrangement in the middle of the living room. If Derek was going to be a bastard and throwing him out from the loft, at least he should leave Cora his gift.

“I’m going to kill you.” Derek recovered faster than what he expected (yes, yes, werewolf), and grabbed the front of his shirt.

“I was trying to –”

Before Stiles could plead his case, they both heard the loft’s door opening. Stiles could swear he heard music, and his stomach was turning into knots. Why was he so nervous? His flowers were amazing!

“Cora!” Stiles said, happily, trying to get free from Derek.

She just frowned and looked at the flower arrangement.

 

 

“It’s a true story,” Stiles said, finally free from Derek’s claws and coming closer to her. “Wanna try?”

“This has to be the most idiotic pun I’ve ever seen,” Cora said, sounding amused. Stiles could totally hear the amusement in her tone.

“It’s a clever and amazing pun.” Stiles defended his work, “and you need to know that these flowers cost me being banned from Mrs. Soli's shop FOREVER.”

“Weren’t you already banned from there after what happened when you thought it would be a good idea to pretend you were a flower?” Derek asked.

“Scott told you that?” Stiles marked this day as the one where he disowned his best friend. “I was 12, excuse my creativity. Anyway, mini-Hale, what do you think?”

“Well…”

“Cora, I parked the bike down the street; I hope that’s not a problem. Oh… hello?”

You know when in movies, all the scenes where the main character got their heart broken happened in slow motion? Right now, this felt like that. Stiles saw this tall, handsome, bulky and somehow model type guy, smiling and looking like a Greek God.

What the hell was happening? When this turned into his worst nightmare?

“It’s fine,” said Derek, since nobody had added anything and Stiles was trying too hard not to murder him. “I’m Derek Hale, Cora’s brother.”

“Ah, nice to meet you.” Greek God smiled, shaking Derek’s hand. “And you are?”

Now Greek God was talking to him. And he was completely speechless.

This was a first, his dad probably would be excited.

“Out of here,” Stiles said, finally recovering.

He knew Cora and Derek were looking at him while he made his dramatic exit, but he didn’t care. This was something unexpected, and if being in love with Lydia Martin for all those years left as a lesson, it was never wooing someone who was already taken.

The question was: Who was this guy? He called Cora by name, and entered the loft with easiness. But he didn’t know Derek, and that meant… maybe he was Peter’s boyfriend?

Now it wasn’t the time to freak out. Yes, he already did that and acted stupidly, but at least it would give him time to think his next step.

This called for drastic measures.

“Hello?” He heard the feminine voice when the call connected.

“Lydia. Code Kanima.”

“Come to my house. Bring coffee, and stop calling that ‘code Kanima’.” Lydia said.

“On my way.”

If anyone could help him right now, it was Lydia Martin.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed the story so far.


End file.
